If you are a faithful reader, you know just how full and ridiculous our travel schedule has been. If you are just now joining us, take a look through our older posts.
Married on the fourth of May,
an immediate mini-moon to Austin,
REST 3 days.
a weekend trip to Dallas for Mother's day,
REST 5 days.
a trip to Dallas to leave for the airport,
amtrak to Portland,
borrowed car to travel around PDX,
flight to Dallas,
drive to Waco.
REST 10 days.
Drive to Dallas,
fly to BOS, car to Hyannis, ferry to Nantucket, ...round trip
back to dallas,
and to Waco.
Now we are here in Waco and have been for 4 nights. We have yet another weekend road trip on the books.
We haven't felt at home in awhile.
There is this longing to have a space and comfort and a routine that 'home' often connotes. After the great moving saga, we found a space together, but we continued to leave it. Our longest stretch of being at home together has been 10 days. We desire to figure out what it is to stay and rest and commune and entertain and be. In one place. After this next trip, perhaps our last of the summer, or maybe just our last departure from our current space called home, I hope to feel a sense of home with my other, at our current address.
But home, I realize, is a funny word. We have been using it all along in our travels to mean, "the place we are currently staying." But really what we mean is, we are going to the place we shall stay, temporarily or permanently, and feel like ourselves. Before marriage, home was the place where I would feel most like myself, so, it was two places--the house I grew up in, and whatever apartment or dorm room I was in. It wasn't necessarily where my belongings were, but where I was most myself. Sometimes, that was with my belongings, with the things that made me think and mature; sometimes, that was with people, roommates or siblings or parents, who knew my fears and passions and dreams. Now, home is wherever Byron is. We are most ourselves with each other, so our home is now each other.
is where the heart is
is whenever I'm with you
We are learning about making a home with one another, about becoming one family, one household, honest and vulnerable, loving and gracious, together in spirit. We are learning to see ourselves through the other, to see the world through and with our spouse. We are learning to cling to one another and be firmly held together by faith, the thing that truly makes us most ourselves. This version of home we are learning.
While we still desire to rest and remain in one place and create a place to call 'home,' we are also learning that wherever we are, if we are together, we will no doubt be at home.